Orlando vs. Boston

If Kevin Garnett were able bodied (don’t they have cortisone in Boston?) I wouldn’t even waste my massively valuable time writing up this synopsis but since he isn’t, here I GO!!!  After a long series with Chicago we learned a few things about the “new” Celts,  #1 Paul Pierce isn’t as good as he thinks.  Sure he made some big shots but he also effed up a lot, i.e) fouling Noah on a bonehead play that probably cost them the game if not another over time. #2 Boston can get REALLY thin, REALLY fast up front (I am really trying to get a Big Baby joke in here but I am tired) and #3 Brian Scalabrine and Tony Allen are part of an elaborate rouse by Ashton Kutcher to Punk the whole world into thinking these 2 DUDS could actually make and NBA squad.  As for Orlando, I think they are way too big for the Celts but not too deep for them.  If they can get O Town in foul trouble, I think they will be able to pressure their back up players into a big enough hole that they can’t recover but that is a LOOONG stretch….Magic in 6

Atlanta vs. Cleveland

If you skipped the first match up to get to this one you may want to go back to the first sentence and read slowly.  My time is valuable and the Cavaliers time is too.  I mean how is LeBron going to celebrate being MVP at 24 years old when he has to play these damn playoff games.  Cavs = good, Hawks = not good enough. Cavs in 4

Lakers vs. Rockets

I think this is a match up I am anticipating more than most people.  One of 2 of the worlds best players (depending on who you like better) vs. one of the worlds best defenders and piss off artists.  And if you don’t know who I am talking about, its Yao Ming and Sasha Vujacic…..No seriously, earlier in the year Kobe vs. Artest was AWESOME and gave me my favourite clip of the year which I posted on the site here.  I think people are MAJORLY looking past the Big Man and his band of merry men and just thinking LeBron/Kobe finals.  Houston is here for a reason, they have a deep team filled with role players that just come to play basketball.  Sure they don’t have T-Mac but T-Mac doesn’t have knees or a back so he would only slow them down.  What I think this series will come down to is how well Ming can play Gasol and how bad Artest can piss off Kobe.  If Ming gets in foul trouble consistently, Houston loses.  If Artest can piss Kobe off enough to make him shoot 50 times and forget his teammates, I think LA loses.  But…LA in 6

Denver vs. Dallas

I have previously stated my disdain for the Mavericks and their style of play and nothing afforded me more happiness then seeing them get beat on Sunday while I was nursing a WICKED hangover (THANK YOU PACQUIAO).  I think Denver is WAY too deep, too dirty and too well rounded to even get sucked into the Diggler’s one man band act.  Billups is better than Kidd (at this point in their career), anyone is better than JJ Barea, JR Smith is Jason Terry with attitude, Melo and Dirk are  fairly even, Martin is a real thug as opposed to Josh Howard and Nene is a REAL beast as opposed to Ericka Dampier (shout out to the Big Shaqtus).  I can see the Mavs lulling the Nuggets to sleep for a game or two so I will say….Denver in 6

Let me know what you guys think in the comments section….PROVE ME WRONG CELTICS!!!

Peace!

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Houston, Memphis and Orlando

To Houston: PG Kyle Lowry and F Brian Cook

To Orlando:  PG Rafer Alston

To Memphis: Unprotected First Round Pick From Orlando, PG Mike Wilks and C Adonal Foyle

Winner: Memphis for sure, the pick and 2 expiring contracts, NICE!

Chicago and New York

To Chicago: F Tim Thomas (again), F Jerome James and G Anthony Roberson

To New York: G/F Larry Hughes

Winner: No one, pretty boring trade actually.

Oklahoma City and New York

To New York: F/C Chris Wilcox

To OKC: F Malik Rose

Winner: New York only because Malik Rose will never set foot in OKC, Believe DAT!

Toronto, Sacramento and Boston

To Toronto: C Patrick O’Bryant

To Sacramento: Will Solomon (THANK GOD)

To Boston: Heavily Protected 2nd Round Pick from Sac-Town

Winner: My Raps of course! They got rid of my least favourite player in HISTORY and they get some height and youth regardless of how slow he is.

Chicago and Sacramento

To Chicago: C Brad Miller and G/F John Salmons

To Sac-Town: F Drew Gooden, F Andres Nocioni and F Cedric Simmons

Winner: Has to be Chicago.  Miller is capable as a C and John Salmons is versatile.  Sac-Town just gets  a salary dump at the end of the year.

There were other trades but nothing too interesting (as if this stuff was). What did you all think of what went down?  Don’t you wish you were going to watch Shaq and LeBron team up?  Man that would have been awesome!

“Tell me how my ass tastes?” ha ha  if you don’t know what that reference means look it up.

Peace!

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Shaquile O’Neal is a big guy (huge guy), and big guys are notoriously awkward when it comes to anything resembling a dance move. I find the song choice for this routine that Shaq Diesel performed with the dance crew Jabbawockeez at the 2009 All-Star Game very fitting. Perhaps Shaq is a “hero” for all the big guys out there. Squash the stereotypes.
Just keep poppin’ and lockin’!

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By FAR the best All Star Weekend of any major sport.  NBA’s All Star Saturday Night is probably my favourite night of the sports year and has been since I was a little kid.  It basically wraps all the best parts of the game into one night of awesomeness, I even like the Shooting Stars competition (Yeah I said IT!).  Along with the main staples, 3 point Shoot out (Go JK), Skills competition and OF COURSE the Slam dunk, this year they have added H-O-R-S-E to the slate of Saturday Night magic.  I have heard a lot of people say this could be crap but I also know a lot of people are excited about this and I am one of the latter.  Ever since the Jordan and Bird commercials back in the late 80’s or early 90s, I have dreamt of watching NBA All Stars playing horse.  Sure they won’t be throwing the ball off the score clock from the 300 level of and arena but I expect to see some crazy things this to go down.

Last night was the annual Rookie vs. Sophomore game (which I usually miss) but this year I HAPPENED to actually be in a bar (what a fluke) and much to the chagrin of my girlfriend, ended up catching the whole game and was very surprised about how good it was.  Sure there was NO defence and Kevin Durant took 25 shots but it was actually competitive.  The rooks were leading pretty much the whole game and then the Durant show started!  He was on fire, finishing the game 17 for 25 from the field for 46 points, the all time record for most points and the MVP.  I think this game tends to be more sloughed off because its only the rookie and sophomores and for the most part is filled with guys that aren’t that well known yet but I think it tends to be more competitive for that reason and because NO sophomore wants to be beaten by a rookie, especially if you’re on their team.  Just for a piece of history, the rookies have only won twice in 10 years of this format.

All the action starts tonight (on TV anyway) at 8pm ET. I will break down who I think will win the events and why don’t you let me know who you think is going to win and then we can have a friendly bet of bragging rights (maybe a beer too if we ever meet) for the winner.  OK here it goes:  Shooting Stars challenge – LA Lakers - I’m taking them because they seem to have the best shooters through the whole team.  Skills Challenge - Devin Harris - I chose Harris because he is flat out the fastest guy here and he can shoot.  3 Point Shootout – Jason Kapono – Do I even have to say why? Raptors, 3 time champ, Raptors. Now for the BIG SHOW – Slam Dunk Contest – Dwight Howard – First off, let ME let YOU know, this guy is my favourite player and has been since I saw one of his high school games.  He is not only the most dominant big man since Shaq but he is a real cool guy and loves playing the game.  He also practiced for over a YEAR on the dunks he did last year and I have to imagine he wants to re-live that glory again and will do so tonight.

If I am around tonight (might have to make up for last night with the girlfriend) I will be live blogging all of tonight’s events so come around 8pm and see whats up.  Well have a good night and a good weekend!

Peace!

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WEST

Centres – Pau Gasol (Lakers) Shaquille O’Neal (Suns) – No problems here – Gasol is the C/PF on the best team in the west and come on, he may not be in his prime but does anybody bring more laughs to the All Star festivities then the Big Aristotle.

Forwards – David West (Hornets) and Dirk Nowitzki (Mavericks) – Hmmm it gets a little sketchy here for me.  I know last year David West has everyone saying  ”Who the F… is this guy killing my team” and I know he is still putting up decent numbers but what about Al Jefferson?  Sure he plays in ‘Sota and more people watch Slamball then WOLVES games but this guy is a MONSTER!  This season he has had TWENTY, 12+ rebound games and 34, 20+ point games.  I know the Mavs aren’t having the best season but Diggler is the man still.  The big German still gets his buckets and lets be honest if he wasn’t in Dallas they would be MUCH worse

Guards – Tony Paker (Spurs), Chauncey Billups (Nuggets) and Brandon Roy (Trailblazers) – Let’s be honest, these guys are GOOD!  Brandon Roy was the rookie of the year 2 years ago and he is only getting better and if he keeps pulling his tricks he might take the title of “Mr. Clutch” from his back court mate in this game Chauncey Billups.  Billups isn’t too shabby himself,  playoffs MVP anyone?  This guys literally has ice water in his veins.  Nobody in my mind right now (besides maybe Roy) is more clutch then this guy(Sorry Robert Horry but you have to play to keep your title). Last but not least Mr. Eva Longoria, this guy has game on and off the court.  He may not be the best passing PG in the league but he may be one of the fastest and best finishers around the hoop for a PG.  The only guy I can think of that is missing but I wouldn’t necessarily swap for these guys is Steve Nash.  His flashy passes are always a fan favourite and plus he’s Canadian so you know he’s my boy.

East

Centre - Chris Bosh (Raptors) - You all know that the Raps are my team but I really don’t see how the Bosh is a centre?  And to tell you the truth, I am not even sure he is the centre for the East squad but by looking at the names of the other reserves, I can’t imagine anyone else falling under “centre” on this squad.  Bosh is a good player and I like him (see: don’t really or just read my Open Letter To Chris Bosh) Zydrunas Ilgaukas is hurt so he couldn’t play so I am fine with him here.

Forwards – Danny Granger (Pacers) and Rashard Lewis (Magic) – This one I am split on – Danny Granger is a straight up player and trust me, no one knows this more than a die hard Raptors fan.  I like Joey Graham but how sick would our squad be with Granger in the starting line up?  Sorry BC but you effed that one up.  Now onto Rashard Lewis, he is on one of the best teams in the East (Magic) as shown by their 3 players on All Star team but is Lewis the second best forward left in the East?  I know this is blasphemy coming from a man in my position (Torontonian) but what about Vince Carter? I know the Nets are not even in the playoff picture but this guy was MADE for the ASG.  Hes got the showtime hops, the creativity and come on…the 2001 slam dunk contest, NUFF SAID!!!  I would even make a case for Antawn Jamison if only for the fact that he is playing in Washington and I feel so bad for him.

Guards – Paul Pierce (Celtics), Devin Harris (Nets), Jameer Nelson (Magic) and Joe Johnson (Hawks) – 2 outta 4 ain’t bad -  The first two guys deserve this for sure.  Paul Pierce, the self proclaimed best player on the planet has too stacked a resume to even bicker about if he deserves this.   Devin Harris was my choice for most improved player of the year and so far he is making me look like a genius.  He is the co-leader of the Nets along with VC and he is FAST.  I have seen him play in Toronto many times and I have NEVER seen a player faster than him while staying in control.  Now onto Joe Johnson and Jameer Nelson.  First I’ll talk about J.J, I know I know 21, 4 and 6 is hard to argue with and I was actually VERY surprised that those were his numbers because I haven’t heard anything from him since Bibby hit town.  Is he a good player?  OF COURSE!  I just think there are some guys that may not have his numbers that are doing more for their team.  Like Rajon Rondo, he may not be rocking a near trip dip every game but he really does make that team run.  When he slashes he gets Ray Ray open for the 3, Garnett open for the easy dunk or Pierce open for any shot he takes.  I just really think its easier to get your numbers on a so-so team (Atlanta) then it is to on the World Champion Celtics and Rondo actually rocked one of the sickest triple doubles of the season with 16, 17 and 13.  Now Jameer Nelson really makes me scratch my head.  How are you a point guard on a team with Dwight Howard and only averaging 5 assists?  If you trained a seal to dribble a basketball he could get at LEAST 10 assists by just tossing the ball in the vicinity of that orange cylinder.  I really think Mo Williams deserved this spot, he has truly transformed the Cavs this year.  I know they have that other player, whats his name? But he seems to be the glue on this team and to be honest.  I know he has basically the same numbers as Jameer but I just think as far as an All Star game goes, Mo Williams fits the style bit better. 

It probably comes across as splitting hairs to all of  you but…well….it really is.  Who do you think was left off the list?  Leave your team choices in the comment section or just let me know what you think of my choices?

Peace!

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I will put together a full report if this deal actually goes down.  I give the chances of this actually happening a 92% on the GoatDiesel scale of probability!!!

Peace!

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1/4 Man, 1/4 Beast, 1/2 Superhuman

Let’s be honest, it’s JUST too easy for this guy!  Blessed with a body from greek mythology, the smile of 5 year old kid about to steal some cookies and the althletic ability of well, a superhuman. It’s hard to believe there is anything Dwight won’t be able to achieve while in the NBA.  Except maybe a 6th Man of the Year or Most Improved Player award.

Less than a month from his first career triple double (a nasty one at that: 30pts, 18rebs and 10 blocks). D12 hasn’t slowed down and the scary part is, he seems to be getting better.  I haven’t seen lines in box scores like this since another overgrown manchild donned a blue and white  jersey with Magic across the front.  The difference between the two great centres in my mind, Shaq used his dominant size and undying hunger to eat rims and beast his way to massive box scores.  While Howard uses a more fast paced, high flying, did you just fuc… see that approach to his game.

I think the difference in the end will be, while Shaq’s body eventually broke down carrying his massive size around and his pound, pound, pound attitude on the court. For Dwight, I think it will be how long can he continue to turn off a pick, jump through the roof and throw any ball lobbed in his general direction through the rim on his way down. I do believe his penchant for rebound will always be there, his timing on blocks is a inate ability, so as long as his superhuman ability to leap only decreases to human or above average human, he should continue to dominate. Don’t get me wrong, Shaq is a beast, in my opinion one of the 5 best centres ever and he’s having a great season this year.  But for me, I think D12 represents the new breed of Shaq if you will.

Like the NBA Shaq first played in compared to the NBA they both play in now. D12 is leaner, faster and more high flying than Shaq was.  When Dwight ends career will we still be able to compare the two? Will he be in the top 50 players of all time?  Who knows, I would be crazy to make that claim but he does have the tools and time on his side (He’s 23 in his 5th year).  Can he even come close to touching Shaq’s legacy of 4 championships?  Again, who knows? If he was put in a position with players like Kobe and Dwyane Wade it is almost a given.  The only thing I do know is the man is a freak of nature, a hell a lot of fun to watch, a great person and someone to keep your eye on.

Peace!

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